Why do parents often claim that their child is intelligent even if they don’t have much knowledge about their child’s abilities?

Parents and grandparents usually overestimate the intelligence of their offspring because they observe in amazement the rapid rate at which their child absorbs information, while forgetting that we humans learn at a prodigious rate during our early formative years. In a very short time, we acquire verbal language, learn how to read and write, and absorb information quickly, retaining names and reciting snippets of television commercials with almost 100% accuracy. It’s only when their child’s performance is compared to others, that they can estimate their child’s relative intelligence.

Grandparents, whose fluid intelligence has been in decline for decades, rhapsodize over the learning ability of their grandchildren when they observe them navigating through the menus on a computer or cellphone. Words like, “brilliant,” or “genius,” fuelled with the pride of reflected genetic glory, move fluidly through their enthusiastic discourse about their young prodigies.

Intelligence, however, is relative, rather than absolute. That is, it’s easier to discern intellectual differences in a class of primary students than to estimate the intelligence or IQ of a particular child. Elementary school teachers scanning 25 or 30 students in their classroom, observe that some children absorb ideas and master skills quickly, while others have a short interest span, require frequent remediation, and show little joy in learning. The gifted students usually stand out as focussed, eager to learn and enthusiastic in completing their work. The less capable students tend to find the cognitively demanding subjects like arithmetic to be threatening or tedious.

What happens when their child takes that first IQ test? The IQ test measures a child’s intelligence relative to a huge number of people in the same age group. While these tests do not purport to measure intelligence with unlimited accuracy, they are remarkably reliable in predicting a person’s cognitive abilities relative to the average. As one educational superintendent said to me, “Parents, believing their children to be geniuses, purchase books for them up to about grade 5, but after that, reality sets in and the dream is dead.” This seems like a pessimistic perspective, but it reflects the fact that we all want our children to be special, and it’s difficult to disparage that intent. Parental support is a key factor in a child’s success and its absence can be debilitating for the child.

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